Christmas cheer!

We're getting ready to spread Christmas cheer my love! You are so adorable! Everyone loves you. Tomorrow daddy works in the morning but then we go to mama pat and papa Jim's for Christmas. We are so excited! This is what you look like now. Your so amazing Crosby. Keep on growing up so big and strong. Mama loves you so much!

Another precious morning

Your cooing away out in the living room watching cartoons. You just learned how to blow "raspberries" with your lips n tongue. We had a lot of fun last night blowing raspberries back and forth.

You have the best personality Crosby. You are sweet and bright you smile all the time. Sometimes my cheeks hurt you make me smile so much!

Thank you for being so wonderful. Ill never be able to explain to you how much I love being your mother. The best I can think to do is to keep this blog of my feelings and try to be as candid as possible so that when you grow up and read this you might know the depth of my feelings for you.

Mama loves you Crosby and always will no matter what happens or what you do you will always have my love.

I promise you.

We miss Daddy

Two hours ago your Daddy left for DC. He is helping build a new Total hockey store. Daddy manages a store for total hockey and he also has experience with construction so he helps at all the new store build outs as well.

It's good for daddy's job but boy do we miss him when he is gone. The last time he went out of town was when you were five weeks old. It was also mommy's first week back to work. It was hard but luckily we had grandpa Larry and grandma Bev, Auntie Rachel, Uncle David and Audrey to help us. We are so fortunate that we don't have to leave you with anyone but family.

This time grandma and grandpa Fleming are coming on Wednesday and Friday to watch you. That will be so fun! All day with Mama Pat and Papa Jim!

Then on Saturday it's the first so Mama has to move someone in at the apartment building she manages. You may have to come along with me but that's ok. It's just a quick move in.

I'm laying In bed and you are laying in the living room in your pack and play sleeping and listening to "soundscapes" -a radio station on the TV. I'm listening and waiting for you to wake up so we can nurse.

I love you sweetheart. I hope you are having sweet dreams.

Your so dreamy

You had your first dream today. So adorable. Daddy and I were napping in our room. You in the pack and play in the living room. We heard you making little sounds but they were not your usual fussy sounds.

So we went to check on you and you were dreaming and making little cooing noises in your sleep. Very sweet.

We wonder what you are thinking of. We hope that your dreams are always sweet.

We love you Crosby Dean.

Daredevil

You squeal with glee when we pretend to drop you or swing you quickly from side to side.
Right now you are sleeping in your pack and play out in the living room with daddy and Brett Carelson. (Peyton's daddy)
Mommy is in bed with the dogs. She has an earache from a virus. Daddy insists you stay out with him so I can get a full nights rest.
He will bring you to me for your 6am mommy milk. Until then I miss you my little thrill seeker.

First food!

Last night at Auntie Rachel's Mary Kay party Grandma Nana gave you your first taste of rice cereal! You ate about four bites then threw up most of it.

Daddy will try again today. I'm at work now and miss you very much honey. I need to go visit Auntie Rachel after work today because she had surgery on her foot this morning.

Ill probably bring you over there because seeing you always makes Auntie Rachel so happy.

Your a very good boy Crosby. I am so proud of you.

Here we are again

Laying in bed. Sunday morning. Daddy just went to work and won't be home until 7.

You are growing so fast! All my life I have heard people exclaim how fast their children grow but now that you are here I just can't seem to get over how big you are.

You got into 6month clothes already! It's amazing! Of course everyone says "he's taking after his father" but I know that inside you are like me.

I love you Crosby. So much.

Your first laugh a sound from heaven

Two days ago you laughed for the first time Crosby. It sounded like "ahhhh haaa haaa"

I love your big smile when you open up that cute snapping turtle mouth of yours and stick your chin up and sway your head from side to side. It's so recharging for me and Daddy to see how happy you are. It makes us feel like we are doing a good job taking care of you and that you like your life with us so far.

Right now you are sleeping with your head on my lap in my bed as I'm watching the news and hoping Daddy comes home from work early tonight because I'm not feeling well today.

I love you sweetheart. So much so much so much.

I just can't get enough

Of you!

And you just can't get enough food!!!

It's Saturday morning and you are working on waking up. I have a bottle all ready for you because you ate all mommy's milk earlier this morning.

It's been hard for Mommy to keep up with your hunger! I didn't want to give you any formula at all for your first year but you are so very hungry we had to start supplementing. At least you are still getting some Mommy milk with all it's antibodies that help you have higher immunity and better protection from sickness.

When you grow up and have babies sweetheart, make sure that your wife tries hard to breast feed your children. It isn't easy and she may want to give up but try to give her support and do all that you an to help her. It's the very best gift you can give your children.

Daddy has helped Mommy so much. Without his support I probably would have had to stop by now. When mommy had you, her hands were numb from pregnancy induced carpel tunnel. Daddy had to squeeze mommy's boobies to see of they were full! Mommy couldn't feel anything!

Daddy and I found out we were having you exactly one year ago TODAY! It was 11-11-11. Ill never forget that night.

Mommy had to leave work because she had a very bad headache. Daddy and I went to Auntie Rachel's. on the way mommy bought a pregnancy test. When we got there Mommy took the test and it said she was pregnant!

We were blessed with you the first time we tried. On daddy's birthday!

Mommy's heart beat fast even though we were trying for you because she knew the enormity of the task ahead of her. It took me some time to go out and tell daddy the good news.

Then we told AW and let her tell Grandpa Larry! Then we called Grandma Nana and finally Mama Pat and Papa Jim.

Everyone else had to wait another two months to find out.

Today we are going to try to go run some errands if you coperate. It's getting cold out now so I'll have to bundle you up!

I love you so much Crosby. You are so much work but you light up my life. I'm so happy you are the little baby that came to us. Daddy loves you too.

X- I just lightly kissed your hot sweaty little head as you lay in Mommy and Daddy's bed next to me as I watch the morning news.

Your just so sweet

You are now smiling and cooing. Me and daddy can't believe how fast you grow!

It's amazing for us to talk to you and you coo back. We love it! We love you so much.

You are all we care about now. :) I took daddy to the Vikings game Sunday for his 32nd birthday. We had so much fun with Krissy and Joe Salinas (Simons mom n dad) an Joes brothers but couldn't wait to get home to be with you! Your our favorite!

Right now you are trying to stay awake long enough to finish eating. You fight your sleep every time these days, even if your so tired that you have to take mini-naps In order to fuel your sleep-fighting campaign.

Xo sweet boy. Sleep good because you are sooooo loved. Xo

Two months old

I know we have only been together for a short time however I feel as though you have always been with me.

When I look at you you I feel like I have been studying your face all my life even though it's only been 8 short weeks.

There are no words to describe how much I love you. You will not understand how true that statement is until you know the love you will someday have for your own children.

Until then all I can say to try to make you know my love is that- it's all for you.

My son. My baby boy. My Crosby Dean.

Every thought I generate. Everything I do and everything I put out into the world is now preceded by a thought about how it will effect you.

I promise to devote myself to you and any siblings I give you until my dying breath and if possible even after that.

It's an easy promise to make. I've already given you my heart. I feel like you emerged from my own soul. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you Crosby.

Even when you think I am hurting you please remember that whenever you hurt I hurt ten times more because it's my job to spare you pain.

I hope you will enjoy reading this blog someday. It will be yours alone for a while until your siblings are born (god willing) then they will take over and eventually the writings will be for all of you. It would be a nightmare for mommy to keep up separate ones for everyone. We need to try to have reasonable expectations in order to succeed.

Right now you are sleeping next to me in my bed. I'm watching Marie Antoinette and snuggling you and feeding you when you are hungry.

Xo